The end of the world was heralded by hash tags.
#dawnofthedead #apocalypsenow #Zpoc #shoottheminthehead #RUN
When the first wave of infected started eating other people’s faces, it went viral on Social Media. Twitter and Facebook were ablaze with what people thought was an elaborate hoax, amplified by incredible Photoshop skills. In this day and age, anything can be faked after all – Hobbit feet, silicone boobies, zombies.
Mediocre information gets sensationalized via click bait sites. We were a jaded society, and only fools believed all the bullshit that trolled the internet.
Then suddenly, every channel was interrupted by emergency live-streams all over the world. When they cancel Dancing with the Stars in America, and disrupt the airing of a rugby match in Australia, you know some serious shit was going down. The situation escalated rapidly, irreversibly. No day went by without horrifying montages of mutilated bodies.
It was visceral, haunting… unreal.
The thought of consuming a burger after those visual attacks made me gag. For a few days after, I turned vegetarian. And chocolatarian. That’s my excuse for bingeing on brownies anyway.
Soon, the telecasts fizzled out, just as abruptly as they came. Then there was absolutely nothing. Just white noise on the telly.
It was chilling somehow, all that nothing.
In New Zealand, we mourned the world’s decline. Then we closed our doors to it. All borders were shut and barricaded to keep the contagion away. We were safe.
Or so we thought.
We didn’t count on a luxury liner cruising unexpectedly into our false sense of security. That’s not a metaphor. The fleet literally and violently crashed onto the Port of Tauranga, unleashing ravenous senior citizens and ship crew. All very keen to take advantage of the advertised Five-Star Dining Experience. I suspect we weren’t exactly part of the special dietary needs accommodated for.
On a morbid side note, humans are gluten-free and technically acceptable for the Paleo Diet, right?
Even in a country where sheep outnumber the human population by millions, there was still a bloodbath.
No, we didn’t escape the end of the world.
I don’t think anyone did.
— RECIPE —
- 250 grams DARK CHOCOLATE (Whittaker's 50% Cocoa Dark Block), chopped
- 120 grams BUTTER (unsalted), cut into cubes
- 15 grams (2 tablespoons) COCOA POWDER
- 150 grams (3/4 cup) SOFT BROWN SUGAR
- 1 teaspoon VANILLA EXTRACT
- 3 (size 7) EGGS
- 100 grams (roughly 1 cup) SELF RAISING FLOUR
- 1/4 teaspoon SALT
- 80 grams (roughly 1/2 cup) WHITE CHOCOLATE CHIPS
- 70 grams (around 3/4 cup) WALNUTS, crushed
- 80 grams (3/4 cup) frozen BOYSENBERRIES, fresh should work too
Preheat oven to 180 degrees C.
Grease a 23 cm (9 inch) square pan, or line it with baking paper.
Melt the chocolate and butter by putting them in a large stainless steel bowl, placed over a saucepan of simmering water. Stir gently to combine.
When properly emulsified, remove from heat. Then add the cocoa powder and sugar .
Whisk in the eggs, followed by the vanilla extract.
Then dump in the salt and flour, folding with a spatula. Stir in the white chocolate chips and walnuts while you're at it.
Pour into the pan, leveling the top with the back of a spoon, if uneven.
Press the boysenberries into the batter, spreading them evenly across the pan.
Bake for around 30 minutes, or do the toothpick test. But don't over bake, the toothpick should have some moist clumps sticking to it.
Take out of the oven and cool on a wire rack.
Serve chilled. Or at room temperature, whichever you fancy.
Makes: 1 (23cm/9") Square Pan