BONGUSTO ARTISANAL PASTA

          Jake Slater was standing outside my house.  In his boxers.  Shirtless.   Six-pack abs and toned biceps.  So freaking hot. Missing half of his face.  Okay, not so hot.   The one time my high school crush dropped by for a visit, and he’s a walking cadaver.   My life is a romantic wasteland.   That morning was a scheduled supply run with Finn, and I didn’t want to be late.  I made my way to the front door, and quietly descended down the steps towards the street.  The cable car is too loud and slow so I leave it parked up top, by the house. At the foot of the stairs, I stayed behind the barb wired concrete fence to assess the threat level.  What use to be Jake was looking at me [Read More]


BANANA-HONEY & WALNUT MUFFINS 4 Comments

        I am Raven Marzipan Wilder.   What can I say, my father was a nature enthusiast and my mom was a baker.  She moved and semi-retired to Stewart Island with my Aunt Emilia, shortly after dad passed away.  That was 5 years ago.   By the way, I hate marzipan.  If I were to rename myself according to a favorite sweet treat, I’d be Raven Tim Tam  Wilder. Maybe Raven Banana Muffin  Wilder.  That has a nicer ring to it.   Speaking of which, the banana muffins in my freezer will probably be the last ones I ever eat.  Unless New Zealand suddenly turns tropical and start sprouting banana trees.  Who knows, there’s a lot of weird shit happening lately. Note that the muffins are shaped like cartoon piggies.  I like my [Read More]


BOYSENBERRY, WHITE CHOCOLATE & WALNUT BROWNIES

        The end of the world was heralded by hash tags. #dawnofthedead  #apocalypsenow  #Zpoc  #shoottheminthehead  #RUN   When the first wave of infected started eating other people’s faces, it went viral on Social Media.  Twitter and Facebook were ablaze with what people thought was an elaborate hoax, amplified by  incredible Photoshop skills.  In this day and age, anything can be faked after all – Hobbit feet, silicone boobies, zombies. Mediocre information gets sensationalized via click bait sites.  We were a jaded society, and only fools believed all the bullshit that trolled the internet.   Then suddenly, every channel was interrupted by emergency live-streams all over the world.  When they cancel Dancing with the Stars in America, and disrupt the airing of a rugby match in Australia, you know some serious shit was going down.  The situation escalated rapidly, irreversibly.   No day [Read More]


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